Wednesday, June 9, 2010

"Daddy, Play Number 4!"

"Daddy, play number 4!"

Each time his dad was anywhere near the cd player, we heard that command.

Don't know why, but he loved it...

His 4 year-old frame, stout and chubby and beautiful, for whatever reason, felt the words to this song.

The boy was born with the heart of his mother.

Some would call it his biggest asset...

Some would call it his downfall.

I, personally, would call it one of the biggest gifts of my lifetime.

To literally be able to see yourself growing inside of another human being has to be the most amazing experience anyone could ever hope to see.

I know that boy's heart.

He knows mine.

He's Mama's boy.

I can only hope I've done him justice.

Tomorrow, he turns eighteen.

Yes, we've climbed the mountains...

We've fought...

We've laughed...

We've cried...

We've failed...

We've persevered.

Almost 18 years ago to this very second, I began to feel the first pains of labor...

Half believing it...

Half believing I had simply talked myself into feeling it...

The anticipation of making his acquaintance grew.

I'll never forget climbing into bed that night and holding my hand on my belly as I felt that last pain as I drifted off.

Nor will I forget opening my eyes at 3 the next morning and waiting on the next pain just to be sure it was real and not imagined.

They had told us he was a girl.

For all those months, I had been awaiting the arrival of a boy only to have all my hopes dashed by the image coming through the sonogram.

He came into the world at 1:03 p.m. on Wednesday, June 10, 1992.

The sonogram was ever so wrong.

The boy I had dreamt of was here.

Covered in jet black hair from his head to his toes, he was exactly what I had been waiting on.

Oh my God, people, the absolute honor of watching that child grow has been one I did not deserve...

I did not earn it.

It was granted to me.

I am ever so humbled...

I am ever so grateful...

I am ever so proud to be his mother.

Tomorrow, he becomes what society considers a man.

To me, he is, and always will be, my baby boy.

The one I will forever hear saying, "Daddy, play number 4!"


  1. Awwwwww happy birthday to him. :)

  2. my son is 26 and still my little boy. He had to push me away....that's just another biological urge....but ...I sure know what you I love this song!

  3. "the absolute honor of watching that child grow has been one I did not deserve..."

    I dunno about that. But, know the feeling. Children humble us, I think... :)