And...I Missed You...

Dude...

Maggie and I had some fun this morning.

Without giving it away, just let me tell you this much...

She gave a poor girl hell...

Because THAT girl was in the WRONG place...

At the RIGHT time.

Somewhere between the outrageous laughter and thinking I was sure to wet my pants, somewhere I had the thought...

"When was the last time you felt this free and had so much fun?"

And, without hesitation, I answered myself...

"July 19, 2009."

And, I missed you.

My beautiful friend, life has changed so much for me since then.

So many times I've needed YOUR voice...

And, found silence.

And, I missed you.

I think you've moved forward in your journey.

I know I don't feel you around me anymore...

Which leaves so very lonely.

And, I miss you.

You're not in my air anymore.

You are; however, in my heart.

Just sometimes, I want you in my air.

And, I miss you.

You wouldn't even recognize the life I'm living right now.

And, dude, honestly, it's almost better for you this way.

You'd be an absolute wreck right now worrying.

But, the fact that I can't call you up and TELL you not to worry...

That I am fine...

Breaks my heart.

And, I miss you.

Sometimes, I wonder why it was that you decided that I would stay...

And, you would go.

Even though I know that answer.

Knowing what I know, it still doesn't help.

And, I miss you.

This hole in my heart, without doubt, I now realize will never fill.

It gets easier, but it's still there, and sometimes...

I'm back to where I was at 3 a.m. that morning.

And, I miss you.

You are never to be forgotten...

You are to always be loved...

You are to always be remembered...

Even though...

I miss you.

And, I always will.

I love you, my friend...

Today...

Yesterday...

Tomorrow...

Forever...

I will miss you.